I just celebrated my 30 year anniversary of providing for others what I wished I would have received growing up. From the educators and mental health practitioners I had while experiencing trauma, I wished I had felt a genuine warmth and presence that conveyed, at a visceral level, that I mattered.
Thirty years is also how long I have been journaling in detail, and when I look back on entries from that time, I longed for stability, balance, and peace. Enter the dearest friend and colleague I have ever known, Dr. Beth Randolph. She immediately began loving me unconditionally, celebrating me for being just as I was, including me in her family that was, and is, beyond what anyone could hope for.
I lost Beth a year and a half ago after her long and torturous battle with cancer.
Our last FaceTime together, in spite of the tremendous pain she was in, was filled with joy and celebration of the work. She and I shared a commitment and passion to bringing sensory, somatic healing to all. She radiated on that call. I will never forget it. She was so excited to share with me what happened after we had consulted on a previous FaceTime. On that call, after speaking together about one of her clients, we realized VOO would likely increase the clients’ vagal tone and bring much-needed, fast relief that would reinstate hope and commitment to this unusual process.
She challenged that client to VOO for 30 straight days, just a few minutes a day, and to write about what she noticed happening inside her body immediately afterwards. How grateful I felt and still feel that Beth trusted the zany tools I learned from my master teacher, Dr. Peter Levine.
It didn’t take more than a week for her client to come back into her office excitedly, wanting to understand how the strange tool was so profoundly life-changing for her. That Beth and I had the opportunity to bask in that beautiful reward before she left us, will be a comfort to me as I try to live without her.
Today I celebrate Beth, our 30 year friendship, the 30 years I’ve tried to be the best version of her I can possibly be, and the 30 years you all have allowed me into your lives. From using the very tools I teach to others, as well as experiencing Beth’s unprecedented capacity to love, I have that stability, balance, and peace I longed for. And I swear to you, I can viscerally feel how happy she is for me!
Thank you, Beth. I miss you everyday AND I carry on our work, always in your memory, always for you.
